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Toronto media to Rob Ford: You should maybe think about resigning (but only just maybe)

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robfordoncrackIf you understand the above reference, you are a worthy reader of this blog.

For the record, back when the Rob Ford Crackstarter was surging towards its funding goal, I was pretty sure the tape of The Mayor of This CityTM smoking crack was real.  After all, when was the last time Rob Ford denied he did something and wasn’t later proven wrong?

Yeah, don’t answer that question.  Ever since he’s been in office (and probably before), Ford’s MO has been to deny, deny, deny until overwhelming evidence forces him to admit “Yeah, I did that, and I was wrong.  But hey, it only happened once…”  Only this time, it’s been once too many.  Of course, the beauty of his latest confession wasn’t that he admitted to having used crack cocaine, but that he did so in one of his drunken stupors.  So now we can drop all the “allegedlies.”  The alleged Mayor of This CityTM has actually smoked crack cocaine in one of his actual drunken stupors.  And as CBC knows, there’s been a few of them…

But here’s the crazy part: Rob Ford says he isn’t going anywhere–at least not until October 27, 2014.  Yeah, you could say he’s pretty stubborn.  Pigheaded, even.  Thing is, when you’ve already declared war on, oh, about half of the media outlets in the Centre of the Known Universe, well, let’s just say it’s gonna be a looooong 354 days.

The opening salvo in the War on Ford PC (Post Crack) was fired by–who else–the Toronto Star, who apparently figured this would be a pretty good time to increase the price of their paywall in the process.  Turns out they have no problem paying for a video, as long as the sum doesn’t exceed four figures.  Y’know, cuz their circulation is way down, eh?  Dying medium, and all…

Anyhoo, the video in question makes Ford sound like Hulk Hogan (who, incidentally, he recently defeated in an arm-wrestling match) with a bad case of Tourette’s–or rather, a disease that makes you drop a buncha f-bombs.  No word as to who he was addressing when he said “I’ll rip his f—ing throat out. I’ll poke his eyes out. . . . I’ll make sure that motherf—er’s dead,” but I gotta say, The Mayor of This CityTM cuts a mean promo.  I would definitely be checking under the apron for brass knuckles if I was his next opponent!

But next time, Ford should probably be checking under the table for camera phones.  Cuz while conservative columnist Christie Blatchford condemned this “new low for Canadian journalism,” everyone from The Star to The Sun(!) was posting excerpts of the thing, hoping to lure unsuspecting readers behind their paywalls for the full story.

And that’s why, although they’ll keep trying to entice The Mayor of This CityTM to resign by shoveling layer after layer of dirt onto his football-shaped, football-field sized coffin, the Toronto media doesn’t really want Rob Ford to resign.  I mean, not even his brother could give them such a boost in readership–although Milwaukee-based hardcore band Enabler must surely appreciate the extra page views. ;)   Let’s face it, there will probably never be another Toronto mayor like Rob Ford…

…but do we really hafta put up with him till next October!? :(

fordamania



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